i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
