would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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