I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
