The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
