That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Randomize
