Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
