Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
