Pants 0. Shit 1.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
