Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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