What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
