hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
