On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
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