Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
there is glitter all over my balls
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