Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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