the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
