I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Randomize
