it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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