This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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