how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize