I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
