Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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