Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
