i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
