He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
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