dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I am mentally ready for anal.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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