cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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