God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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