she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Randomize
