In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
