He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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