We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
