Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
