Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize