there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
