Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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