chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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