Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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