You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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