There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
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