I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
Couch. On fire.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
