i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
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