it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
