When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
So squirting runs in the family.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
