she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I want a musical about memes.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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