you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
