so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
