Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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