i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
