i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
