omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize